We are often asked about the process of child custody mediation by our clients. With years of experience as family lawyers, we understand that going through a divorce is tough – for you, your ex-partner, the children, and the wider family. When emotions are high and the future is uncertain, there can be a significant amount of conflict that arises in the decision-making process, leading one or both partners to find themselves unable to compromise or reach a decision in the best interests of the children.
In Australia, as discussed in our recent child custody blog, the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth) emphasises that first and foremost, couples should not use the Courts where possible and instead engage in child custody mediation before escalating to the Court. Even where a parenting order application is made through the Court, the applicant will most likely be obliged to demonstrate that they have attempted to resolve their differences before having the Court intervene.
Custody is no longer a term used by the Family Law Courts, opting instead for terms associated with what time a child spends with each parent and what communications they will have. If it is safe, both parents are encouraged to play an active role in their children’s lives for the benefit of their wellbeing. However, it can be difficult to come to an agreed decision on issues such as health, living arrangements, finances, and education.
When parents can’t agree during child custody discussions, that’s where a mediator comes in. A family lawyer can organise for an experienced Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner to facilitate discussions between both parties in an impartial, calm manner. The goal of mediation in custody cases is to come to an agreement approved by both sides that can be turned into either a Parenting Plan or approved by the Courts in a formal Consent Order if required.
Mediators are not there to make judgments or take sides. They are engaged to essentially chair a meeting between both parties and facilitate proactive discussion in a safe, controlled environment that allows a resolution to be reached that is in their children’s best interests.
How do I go about getting a mediator?
There are several options for child custody mediation. The most cost-effective is the use of the Family Relationship Centres, Family Relationships Australia, or other public and community-based services. These services can assist parents in discussing the issues and potentially writing up a new Parenting Plan. Legal representatives are not permitted in this process, however.
Private child mediation services also exist, usually at a higher cost. Your family lawyer can attend and represent you throughout the mediation. This can be helpful to receive advice on the spot regarding the law relating to your particular matter, your rights, and the impact of any proposals. A solicitor can then draft the agreement terms on the day if it is appropriate, usually to be formalised soon after.
Going to court is usually avoided and when undertaken is usually expensive. Friendly mediation allows you to come to an acceptable resolution swiftly and cost-effectively.
When isn’t mediation appropriate?
Sometimes, mediation isn’t an appropriate course of action, particularly in circumstances involving family violence. In such cases, the support of a lawyer can assist in effectively dealing with challenging cases to ensure your interests are protected. If there are allegations of abuse, your lawyer can advise whether the case should proceed in Court instead of with a mediator.
Should I seek legal advice before going into child custody mediation?
The most effective mediation happens when both parties have sought legal advice about their circumstance beforehand. You are much more likely to be prepared, to understand the probable outcomes, your options, and how a Court might deal with your matter. By figuring this out in advance, and understanding your legal position, both parties are more likely to be more informed and will have considered in advance of negotiations what they are or aren’t willing to compromise on.
Your lawyer can come to mediation sessions and advise you as the session progresses. Sometimes mediation can become heated or tense when sensitive and important issues are addressed and having your lawyer with you ensures you have your say and your interests and those of your children are prioritised throughout.
How to approach mediation
Preparation is key to effective mediation. With the support of your lawyer, you can approach mediation with more of an open mind, ready to listen and to develop a mutually satisfactory agreement. Remember to keep your children and their best interests in mind and be aware of the impact of conflict on them. Importantly, it’s best to approach mediation as a place to solve parenting problems rather than bring up any other marital issues.
Mediation in custody cases isn’t always smooth sailing, but by remembering that you are there to find a solution for your children and listening to the advice of your lawyer and the guidance of the mediator, you are much more likely to reach a settlement that works for both of you.
What can be resolved in mediation?
The most common topics that are discussed and resolved in child custody mediation are things like living arrangements or relocation, child support, health issues, education, religion, how time will be split between parents and how school holidays will be spent, overseas travel, and the division of payments for things like after-school activities.
What is the process of mediation?
When a mediator is appointed, each parent is normally invited to a pre-mediation meeting separately to establish whether the case is suitable for child custody mediation. If you have appointed a lawyer, they will advise you whether this is the case and what available options there are.
Both parties can then be asked to prepare a short statement to bring to the initial session, outlining what they hope to achieve from mediation.
Each mediation session can run for a shorter period, such as around three hours, or even a full day. In some cases, it can take several sessions to resolve some of the more significant issues. This is expedited if both parties come prepared and willing to compromise.
If no agreement can be reached in mediation, then a certificate will be issued by the mediator. Either parent can then file for parenting proceedings in the Court. Such a certificate will also be issued if a genuine effort isn’t made by one parent to resolve the dispute, if a parent fails to attend, or for another relevant reason.
I am considering child custody mediation, what should my next steps be?
Where possible, it would be prudent to speak to a family lawyer who can help you understand your options before appointing a mediator. Daykin Family Law is expertly skilled in children’s and parenting matters including child custody mediation, and works closely with psychologists, social workers, and mediators to help you and your family stay out of Court wherever possible. We can recommend a suitable mediator for your matter and assist in inviting the other parent to mediation.
At Daykin Family Law, we place a high importance on assisting clients to reduce conflict and maintain respect in the co-parenting relationship after separation as much as possible. Shannon Daykin is an experienced Family and Divorce Lawyer. An Accredited Family Law Specialist, Shannon was recently named a Leading Family & Divorce Lawyer (Recommended, Brisbane) and a Leading Parenting & Children’s Matters Lawyer (Recommended, Queensland) in the prestigious Doyle’s Guide 2018 and 2019. In 2019, Daykin Family Law was named in the Doyle’s Guide as a Leading Family & Divorce Law Firm (Recommended).
We give you expert legal advice on the most appropriate and cost-effective course of action for you and your family. Contact us at (07) 3338 5645 to make an appointment for a fixed fee initial consultation today.
With around 48% of divorces involving children under 18 years old in Australia, creating a co-parenting plan that minimises the negative effects of separation for children still living at home is crucial.
Parenting plans can be complex and require patience, understanding and often, a helping hand.
At Daykin Family Law, our expertise surrounding parenting plans and disputes has helped us get recognised as one of Brisbane’s leading lawyers in parenting and children matters in 2023 and prior years.
We’ve used our knowledge and expertise to create a guide that will help you create a parenting plan, tips for some of the best communication strategies, and to help prepare you to navigate any potential challenges.
What Is Co-Parenting? - Meaning And Benefits
Co-parenting can be understood as a shared parenting arrangement where separated or divorced parents work together to raise their children. It involves communication, collaboration, and mutual decision-making, focusing on your children’s well-being and best interests. There are a range of benefits when parents can successfully co-parent including:
- Provides children with stability and a sense of security.
- Reduces conflict exposure, benefiting children’s emotional health.
- Encourages both parents to remain actively involved in their children’s lives.
- Helps children maintain strong relationships with both parents.
When creating a co/parenting plan, it may be best to ensure compliance the Family Law Act (Cth) 1975, depending on your circumstances. Agreements can be recorded in a Parenting Plan under the Act or consent orders, as some examples.
The Legal Framework Of Co-Parenting In Australia
Australia’s approach to co-parenting after separation is governed by the Family Law Act (Cth) 1975, which prioritises the best interests of children in all parenting decisions.
Under this framework, co-parenting arrangements are encouraged as a means to ensure children have meaningful relationships with both parents post-separation when it is safe to do so.
This Act outlines the responsibilities and rights of parents, stressing the importance of children’s safety and emotional well-being.
It advocates for shared responsibilities and duties, focusing on the best interests of the child as the paramount consideration.
In Australia, the Family Law Act also supports flexible arrangements, catering to the diverse needs of different family structures.
With this in mind, you’re now ready to create your co-parenting plan.
Guide To Developing A Co-Parenting Plan
The most important step in creating a parenting plan or co-parenting plan is to prioritise the needs and well-being of your children above all else. Every decision and discussion should be centred on what is best for them. To ensure your parenting plan achieves this goal, it’s crucial to approach these conversations with openness and a willingness to understand each other’s perspectives if it is safe to do so. Here are some examples:
Co-Parenting Plan Element | Specifics to Include |
Living Arrangements |
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Time Arrangements |
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Education Plans |
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Healthcare Arrangements |
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Extra-curricular Activities |
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Parenting Styles and Values |
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Travel and Vacations |
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Communication Guidelines |
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Financial Responsibilities (see note at the end of this table) |
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Dispute Resolution |
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Process for Revising the Plan |
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Special Considerations |
|
Transition Guidelines |
|
For certain financial responsibilities relating to child support to be binding and enforceable, these may need to be recorded in a Limited Child Support Agreement or Binding Child Support Agreement.
Communication Strategies For Successful Co-Parenting
Effective communication stands at the heart of successful co-parenting. It lays the foundation for mutual understanding, problem-solving, and decision-making, all crucial in maintaining a healthy environment for your children. Here are our key strategies to enhance communication in a co-parenting arrangement:
Establish Clear Communication Channels
Decide on the most effective and consistent ways to communicate, be it through emails, texts, or phone calls. Utilising co-parenting apps can also streamline communication, keeping it focused and organised. This is of course on the basis it is safe to do so.
Adopt A Business-Like Tone
Approach communication with a professional and respectful tone can assist. This helps in keeping discussions objective and focused on your children’s needs, rather than personal grievances.
Engage In Active Listening
Make a conscious effort to listen and understand the other parent’s perspective. Acknowledging their views does not always require agreement, but it fosters a collaborative environment.
Choose Your Battles Wisely
Not every disagreement needs to escalate. Determine which issues are worth discussing and which can be let go in the larger interest of your children.
Plan Regular Check-Ins
Schedule regular discussions to review how the co-parenting plan is working and address any emerging issues. This can prevent small problems from becoming larger conflicts.
Utilise Professional Support When Needed
In situations where communication becomes challenging, don’t hesitate to seek help from mediators or counsellors. They can offer guidance and strategies to improve dialogue.
Remember, effective co-parenting communication is not about winning arguments but about working together for the best outcomes for your children. By prioritising respectful and clear communication, you pave the way for a more harmonious and effective co-parenting journey.
Navigating Challenges And Conflicts In Co-Parenting
Handling challenges and conflicts is an inevitable part of co-parenting. If these obstacles are not managed effectively, they can impact not only the parents but also the children involved. Here are some strategies to navigate these difficulties:
- Acknowledge and respect differences in parenting styles and perspectives
- Focus on collaborative problem-solving over dwelling on the problem
- Keep children out of conflicts
- Seek professional guidance when conflicts become unmanageable or safety is an issue
- Develop a conflict resolution plan to handle disagreements
- Regularly review and adjust your co-parenting plan as your situations change
Remember, the goal in co-parenting isn’t to avoid conflicts altogether, but to handle them in a way that maintains respect, focuses on solutions, and prioritises your children’s best interests. By adopting these strategies, co-parents can create a stable and positive environment for their children.
Should I Involve A Lawyer During The Co-Parent Planning Process?
Deciding whether to involve a lawyer during the co-parenting planning process is a significant consideration for many parents. Some of the benefits a family lawyer can bring include:
Legal Expertise
Lawyers bring an understanding of family law that is crucial in drafting a parenting plan. They ensure that your agreement is not only fair but also complies with legal standards.
Objective Perspective
Emotions can run high during the planning of co-parenting arrangements. Lawyers provide an objective viewpoint, focusing on the best interests of the children and helping to navigate sensitive discussions.
Ability To Identify Potential Issues
Experienced lawyers can foresee potential problems and address them in the planning stage, which can prevent misunderstandings and conflicts in the future.
Ensuring Enforceability
For a co-parenting plan to be legally enforceable, it often needs to meet specific legal criteria. A lawyer can ensure that all necessary elements are included depending on how any agreement is to be recorded (such as a Parenting Plan or Consent Orders).
Assistance With Mediating Disputes
If disagreements arise during the planning process, lawyers can engage mediators or liaise with the other parent or lawyer, helping to find amicable solutions that serve all parties involved.
While involving a lawyer in the co-parenting planning process is not mandatory, their involvement can bring legal assurance, clarity, and peace of mind, making the process smoother and more effective for everyone involved.
Other Co-Parenting Resources And Support Systems
While there are numerous counselling services, support groups and educational materials you can use to help navigate co-parenting, below are some links that might help when you feel like you need 3rd party support:
- Relationships Australia provides relationship support services for individuals, families and communities contact
- Australian Psychological Society can provide listings of qualified therapists and psychologists specialising in family matters.
- Family Relationship Advice Line is a national telephone service that helps families affected by relationship or separation issues, including information on parenting arrangements after separation
A suitably qualified family lawyer can help advise on the next steps that need to be taken.
Looking For Help With Your Co-Parenting Plan?
In summary, effective co-parenting requires thoughtful planning, clear communication, and sometimes, the guidance of legal professionals.
By carefully considering each step and seeking the right support, you can lay a strong foundation for a positive co-parenting journey.
If you’re navigating the co-parenting process and need expert legal advice, Daykin Family Law is here to help.
Contact us on 07 3852 5490 or via our online contact form to ensure your co-parenting plan is comprehensive, appropriate, safe, and tailored to your family’s unique needs.
If you have separated from your partner and have care of the children from that relationship, you are, in most circumstances, able to apply for financial assistance from the other parent to contribute to the costs of raising those children, in the form of child support obligations.
Child support stems from a fundamental principle that both parents have a responsibility to provide for their children. After separation, whether married or de facto, an agreement can be reached regarding the type and level of child support that is paid from one parent to the other to make sure that a child is supported financially by both parents. Child support is an ongoing payment that is purely for the financial support of a child from that relationship.
The area of child custody can be fairly complex, particularly if parents cannot come to an amicable agreement or there are extenuating circumstances that require the intervention of the Court. In our previous blog post, you can find out in more detail how to get child custody. Today, we’ve summarised the key things we think you need to be aware of when considering your child support obligations.
How long the obligation lasts
In Australia, child support obligations continue until a child turns eighteen years of age, or to the conclusion of Year 12 if the child turns eighteen during that year of schooling. However, in order for the obligation to continue to the end of Year 12 a specific application must be made. In some circumstances, the Court can order for a parent to financially support an adult child of the relationship.
There are certain circumstances in which the obligation can be stopped early, for example:
- If the child becomes self-sufficient
- If the child marries or enters into a marriage-like (de facto) relationship
- If the child is adopted
- If the child dies
On the other hand, child support can also be extended in circumstances where, for example:
- The child over 18 can’t support themselves because they are completing their secondary or tertiary education
- The child over 18 has a mental or physical disability
This is called adult child maintenance. If you would like to receive child maintenance for your adult child, or you have been asked to pay adult child maintenance, you should get legal advice.
How to calculate child support
The procedure for paying and receiving child support is governed by the Child Support (Assessment) Act 1989 (Cth) and the Child Support (Registration and Collection) Act 1988 (Cth).
The actual process of assessing the amount of child support can be quite complex, but in general terms it involves the use of an 8 step formula;
- work out each parent’s child support income
- work out the parents’ combined income
- work out each parent’s income percentage
- work out each parent’s percentage of care
- work out each parent’s cost percentage
- work out each parent’s child support percentage
- work out the costs of children
- work out the child support amount
In practical terms, the simplest way to work out your potential child support contribution or what you are likely to receive is to use the Department of Human Services Child Support Estimator. The estimator takes you through each step and provides a calculation based on your individual circumstances.
How to pay or receive child support
There are various ways in which you can organise and manage your child support payments. This will depend on your individual circumstances as well as how able you are to communicate with your ex-partner.
Child support can be paid:
- Through the Child Support Agency periodically
- Privately following an assessment
- Directly between the parents (self-managed)
If you and the other parent are not able to communicate effectively, it may be advisable to organise your child support payments though the Child Support Agency by opting for the ‘Child Support Collect’ method.
You are able to change to another arrangement at a later date if you find you need to, however the parent receiving the child support must agree to the change in payment method.
If either the payer or payee are living abroad, child support payments may still apply. If this is the case, you should seek legal advice.
What happens if your child support matter goes to Court
There are limited circumstances where child support arrangements go to Court. Most child support disputes are handled outside of the Court. However, some examples where a case may go to court are:
- where the paternity of the child is in dispute;
- if you have property or parenting proceedings underway and you need to dispute an assessment which does not take into account a parent’s proper circumstances;
- if you are in proceedings for property or parenting matters and you want to halt any assessment process pending the outcome;
- to set aside or vary a child support agreement where the other parent won’t agree to stop or change the arrangements set out in the agreement.
Compiling the correct documentation, serving other parties and the ensuing evidence gathering and subsequent hearing can be complex. It is vital in these circumstances that you seek independent legal advice from a family law specialist.
Daykin Family Law have offices in Brisbane and are highly experienced in navigating the complex area of Child Custody. Director, Shannon Daykin, was named in the prestigious Doyle’s Guide for 2019 in the Leading Family & Divorce Lawyers list (Recommended) and Leading Parenting & Children’s Matters Lawyers list (Recommended).
Daykin Family Law was also named as Recommended in the Leading Family & Divorce Law Firm list.
We will give you expert legal advice on the most appropriate and cost effective course of action for you and your family. Contact us on (07) 3338 5645 to make an appointment today.
