Parenting Arrangements Archives

Parenting arrangements determine how separated parents share the care and decision-making responsibilities for their child. As family lawyers, we believe these arrangements should always prioritise the child’s best interests and safety, emphasising stability, routine, and emotional well-being.

In Australia, the Family Law Act 1975 emphasises that children have a right to a meaningful relationship with both parents, provided there are no safety risks. Parenting arrangements can be informal agreements, formalised Parenting Plans, or legally binding Consent Orders approved by the Family Law Courts. We look at a few common parenting arrangements below.

Common Parenting Arrangements

Shared Care (Equal or Substantial Time with Both Parents)

Shared care arrangements aim to allow children to maintain strong relationships with both parents. However, they generally require a high level of co-operation between parents.

Popular Shared Care Schedules

2-2-3 Plan
- Monday & Tuesday: Parent A
- Wednesday & Thursday: Parent B
- Friday to Sunday: Parent A
- The next week reverses (Monday & Tuesday with Parent B, etc.).
- Best suited for younger children to maintain regular contact with both parents.
- More frequent transitions, which may not suit older children needing stability.
2-2-5-5 Plan
- Monday & Tuesday: Parent A
- Wednesday & Thursday: Parent B
- Friday to Tuesday: Parent A (5 days)
- Wednesday to Sunday: Parent B (5 days)
- Works well for older children with structured school and extracurricular activities.
- Provides more routine by ensuring the same parent has the same weekdays each week.
Week-On, Week-Off – known as “week about”
- Children spend one full week with each parent before switching.
- Suitable for older children who can manage longer periods away from each parent.
Alternating Weekends + Midweek Visit
- Primary parent during the week; non-primary parent has the child every second weekend, plus a midweek visit.
- A practical solution when shared care is not feasible due to distance or parental conflict.

Parenting Arrangements for Younger Children (0-4 Years)

Young children rely on secure attachments and consistent caregiving. Their ability to handle separation from a primary parent depends on their developmental stage.

Recommended Arrangements by Age

0-12 Months: Short, frequent visits (for example, 2-3 times per week for 1-3 hours may be suitable).
1-2 Years: Gradual introduction to longer daytime visits (up to 8 hours) with a trusted routine.
2-3 Years: Introduction of overnight stays if the child has a secure attachment to both parents.
3-4 Years: Up to a few consecutive overnight stays per week, depending on the child’s adaptability and needs.

Key Considerations for Young Children

Breastfeeding: If the child is still breastfeeding, time arrangements can accommodate feeding schedules.
Consistency: Both households should maintain a similar routine for naps, meals, and bedtime.

Gradual Transitions: Sudden or extended separations from a primary caregiver can cause distress.

Key Factors to Consider When Creating Parenting Arrangements

Age and Developmental Needs

When determining parenting arrangements, it’s crucial to consider the child’s stage of growth and development. Younger children often benefit from frequent but shorter visits with each parent to maintain a sense of security. As children grow older, they generally have a greater capacity to handle longer periods away from each parent, allowing for extended stays or weekend visits. Tailoring the schedule to fit a child’s developmental milestones fosters a sense of stability and supports their emotional and psychological wellbeing.

Parental Conflict

In situations where conflict between parents is high, it’s important to focus on reducing children’s exposure to tension or hostility. Strategies such as neutral drop-off and pick-up locations, or scheduled handovers can help create a safer, more predictable environment for children. Minimising confrontations not only lowers stress levels for everyone involved but also ensures the child’s relationship with both parents remains as healthy as possible.

Practicality

Parenting schedules should align with the reality of each family’s circumstances. Factors such as each parent’s work commitments, the distance between households, and the child’s school or extra-curricular schedule all play a role in determining a practical arrangement. Ensuring that transportation, time availability, and household logistics are manageable on a day-to-day basis helps create stability and reduces the likelihood of last-minute complications.

Consistency and Routine

A predictable structure is particularly important for younger children, who thrive on routines that provide a sense of security. Consistency in meal times, bedtimes, and overall daily activities can ease the transition between two homes. Establishing shared rules and similar expectations across households can further support a cohesive upbringing and help children feel less unsettled when moving from one environment to another.

Emotional Wellbeing

Above all, the emotional needs of the child should remain the top priority when creating parenting arrangements. Children should never feel as though they are in the middle of ongoing disputes or responsible for mediating between parents. By maintaining open communication, offering reassurance, and prioritising the child’s sense of safety, both parents can foster an environment where children feel loved and supported, regardless of changes in the family structure.

Challenges and Considerations

Managing High-Conflict Situations

Conflict between parents can negatively impact children. Strategies to reduce conflict include:

Using a Parenting Coordinator or Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) services.
Keeping communication child-focused and professional (e.g., email or co-parenting apps).
Using supervised handovers if necessary.

When Shared Care is Not Ideal

While shared care is right for some families, it may not be appropriate in cases involving:

Domestic violence or safety concerns.
High parental conflict where co-operation is impossible.
Young children who are not yet comfortable with extended separations from a primary parent.

Legal Considerations - the basics at a glance

Family Law Act 1975 (Cth)

The Family Law Act 1975 is essentially the cornerstone of family law in Australia. Contact us today to discuss how the Act applies to your particular circumstances and what arrangements may be most suitable for your children.

Family Court of Australia and Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia (FCFCOA)

The FCFCOA handles family law disputes, including parenting matters and the enforcement of Parenting Orders.

The FCFCOA (Division 1) and FCFCOA (Division 2) have the authority to make or approve Parenting Orders, Consent Orders, and Contravention Orders.
If a parent contravenes a legally binding order, these courts can impose penalties and punishments, alter the parenting arrangement, or mandate programs aimed at improving parental compliance.

Domestic and Family Violence Protection Act 2012 (Qld)

This Queensland-specific legislation aims to protect individuals, including children, from domestic violence. It can override standard parenting arrangements if there are safety concerns in certain circumstances.

Courts may issue Protection Orders that restrict contact between parties if necessary for safety.
If the court deems there is a risk to the child or a parent, the protection order may limit or alter parenting time and handover procedures to ensure safety.

Child Protection Act 1999 (Qld)

The Child Protection Act 1999 provides a framework for Queensland child welfare agencies to intervene if there are concerns about a child’s safety, welfare or wellbeing.

If there is evidence of abuse or neglect, the Department of Children, Youth Justice and Multicultural Affairs (or equivalent if the Department name has changed, which can happen) can investigate and, if necessary, take protective action.

Contact Daykin Family Law

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting after separation. The above is general information only and is not intended to be relied upon or to be taken as legal advice. It is important that you get advice about your specific circumstances, and those of your family. The best arrangement is one that supports the child’s emotional security, routine, and overall wellbeing. Whether through shared care or a primary caregiving arrangement, the focus should always be on what is in the child’s best interests.

If you need legal advice on parenting arrangements, contact us today and we can guide you through the process and help create a plan that works best for your child.

After an agreement has been reached, you may sometimes run into issues with trying to understand the terms of an agreement and how it applies, especially in relation to a child’s care. After intense litigation and/or negotiations, it can be difficult at times to communicate with your former partner in a way that focusses on your child’s wellbeing and this difficulty in communicating can potentially lead to further conflict.

Tracing all the way back to the 1980s, parenting coordination has played a crucial role in helping separated parents to target this issue by improving their co-parenting relationship and assisting parents to manage any issues that come up in relation to a child’s living or care arrangements in a way that captures a child’s needs and best interests.

Who are parenting coordinators?

Parenting coordinators are generally highly specialised individuals who have a strong understanding of the family law system as well as extensive experience in working with families that have a high level of conflict or animosity. They often have a background in practising family law, family dispute resolution or preparing family reports, etc.

When do you usually see parenting coordination take place? What happens?

Parenting coordination is a process that is usually ordered by the Court or consented by both parents after a final agreement has been reached on a child’s care arrangements. The process starts off by the separated parents taking steps to officially engage the parenting coordinator to act in relation to their matter. After this takes place, an initial consultation takes place between the parenting coordinator and the parents to gain an understanding of the individual circumstances surrounding a family, assess the issues of concern held by either parent or formulate an action plan. Following this, a parenting coordinator may arrange joint sessions between parents to assist with implementing an agreement with respect to a child’s care and building a healthy environment which reduces a child’s exposure to conflict.

The process itself may take place in person or via video or telephone conference, and the parenting coordinator essentially focuses on reducing a child’s exposure to conflict by:

Educating parents on how to best communicate with each other and make decisions together in a way that is primarily focused on a child’s needs;
Putting forward strategies to assist with managing any dispute between parents in relation to the implementation of any agreements reached with respect to a child’s care;
Assisting parents to understand the impact of a child’s exposure to ongoing conflict;
Helping parents to adapt to the ongoing needs of a child; and
Providing resources and/or necessary referrals, alongside doing other things necessary to best assist parents with respect to co-parenting and/or understanding a child’s needs considering a family’s unique circumstances.

Is parenting coordination similar to mediation?

No. Although parenting coordination is a type of dispute resolution, the key aim of parenting coordination is to educate separated parents on how to best resolve any disputes arising from the implementation of existing agreements with respect to the child’s care. This contrasts with mediation, where the key aim is to assist both parents and/or parties to reach agreement.

Another key difference is that parenting coordination is generally a non-confidential process which means that a parenting coordinator may be called upon to prepare a report or provide evidence in Court after receiving a request from either parent and/or by the Court to do so whereas mediation takes place in a confidential setting.

Parenting coordination is also an ongoing process as opposed to mediation which generally is a one-off session or sometimes series of sessions in complex cases.

How long does parenting coordination take place for?

Generally, parenting coordination can range from anywhere from a couple of appointments to up to around two years. It is also not unusual for parents to touch base with parenting coordinators to resolve an issue in dispute arising from the implementation of an agreement regarding a child’s care even after a period of two years.

What type of situations would benefit from parenting coordination?

Parenting coordination is used in situations where an agreement has already been reached with respect to a child’s care arrangement, however, a high degree of conflict or animosity is still prevalent between the parents and cause the following:

Parents may find it challenging in order to make a decision together with respect to a child’s care;
Parents may need assistance with discussing modifications to an agreement with respect to a child’s care having due regard to a child’s ongoing needs and age, after final agreement has been reached;
Parents may struggle with communicating with each other for a range of issues, including any hostility, etc; or
Parents may find it difficult to implement or follow the terms of a Court order or parenting plan with respect to a child’s care arrangement.

Parenting coordination is not appropriate for situations where it is likely that the process may threaten a child’s and/or parent’s safety.

Still not sure what is right for your situation? Get in touch with a family lawyer today

Daykin Family Law can provide expert advice on your options and the best course of action with respect to any issues that you may face whilst co-parenting with your former partner. Whilst an agreement may have been reached, engaging a family lawyer or seeking advice does not technically mean further litigation. Each scenario is unique, and we can assist you throughout this journey.

As government restrictions resulting from the COVID-19 pandemic easing, many families are starting to resume travel. A common question that separated parents often ask is whether they can travel with their children following a separation, and if there are any restraints on travelling.

Like all families, when travelling overseas or interstate, there are certain matters that separated families need to consider. Below we address some frequently asked questions when travelling with children from separated families.

Question: Can I travel with my children after separation?

The ability to travel with your children is largely dependent on the care arrangements that are agreed between the parents. If your parenting arrangements are subject to a Parenting Plan, it might stipulate how travel will occur and what information needs to be shared. If your parenting arrangements are subject to parenting Orders, then the Orders may include provisions relating to travel such as when you are permitted to travel with your children, how long you can travel for and what type of notice and information you need to provide to the other parent. It is important to comply with any Orders in this regard to ensure that you are not contravening any Orders.

A word of caution, penalties can apply if a person travels internationally with a child whilst parenting proceedings are on foot in the Court unless it is pursuant to Orders or there is certain consent given. This also applies to situations where Parenting Orders are in place. If your parenting arrangements are not subject to parenting Orders, then it may still be important that you provide notice to the other parent of your intention to travel with the children. This will promote good co-parenting and keep the lines of communication open.

It is not uncommon for a parent to feel reluctant for their children to travel. This may be due to a variety of reasons such as concerns for their personal safety, that they may miss the chance to spend time with the children or perhaps that the children may miss school or other important events. It can be essential to address any concerns that the other parent may have so that these concerns can be alleviated.

Question: What notice and information do I need to provide to the other parent before we travel?

If you want to travel with the children, you should consider providing the other parent with notice of your intention to travel if it is safe to do so. Such notice should ideally be provided well before your intended travel dates and should generally contain information such as a detailed itinerary for the planned travel, including flight times, a copy of a return flight confirmation and contact details such as an address and a telephone contact number for the children as some examples.

If there is a parenting Order or a Parenting Plan in place, then it is important that you check these documents to confirm what information you need to provide to the other parent as there may be certain requirements in this regard. It is important to contact a suitably qualified lawyer if you are unsure of your obligations pursuant to any Orders or Parenting Plan.

Question: How do I get a passport for my children?

Typically speaking, if both parents share parental responsibility, then both parents will need to sign any and all documents necessary to facilitate the production of an Australian passport and any renewal for such passports. If there is an Order for sole parental responsibility, then the other parent may not be required to sign any documents. Again, it is important that you review any parenting Orders or Parenting Plans and seek legal advice in relation to the meaning of these Orders if you are unsure.

Question: What happens if the parents are unable to reach an agreement about travel?

If the other parent is not agreeable to you travelling with the children, you can attempt family dispute resolution or mediation with respect to this issue. If you are still unable to agree, then the parent wishing to travel with the children may need to make an application to the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia (Division 1) or Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia (Division 2) to determine this issue. If the Court deems that it is in the best interests of the children to travel overseas, then the Court can make an Order that the children can travel overseas without the consent of the other parent.

Question: I am concerned that my partner will remove the children from Australia without my consent. What can I do?

If you are concerned that your children may be taken overseas without your consent, you can apply to the Court to have the children placed on the Airport Watch List, otherwise known as the Family Law Watchlist. The Airport Watch List is maintained by the Australian Federal Police and is designed to prevent listed children from travelling overseas without your consent or an Order from the Court. The Airport Watchlist essentially alerts Police in the event that a person tries to remove the children from Australia. In this case, the children will be stopped at the airport and will not be allowed to leave the country. Generally, you may apply to place your children on the airport watch list in certain circumstances, including when:

A court has issued an Order limiting or preventing the children’s travel;
A Court has issued an Injunction limiting or preventing the children’s travel;
There is an application before the Court seeking to limit or prevent overseas travel of the children;
There is an application before the Court seeking an Order to place the children on the Family Law Watchlist; and/or
An Order or Injunction is limiting or restricting the children’s travel overseas which is under an appeal.

If you are concerned that your children may be taken overseas, you should seek immediate legal advice. There are other measures that can also be taken.

Question:
Can I travel with my children if their names are on the Airport Watch List but both parents agree for the children to travel?

If your children are on the Airport Watch List, then it is strongly recommended that you discuss any intended travel with a suitably quailed lawyer before you travel. This is to ensure that you are aware of any potential issues that may arise when you travel. If your children’s names are registered on the Airport Watchlist and both parents consent to the children being taken out of Australia, then you will need to remove your children’s names from the Airport Watchlist before you can travel outside of the country. This is an important step which can be overlooked and can be costly and disappointing when travel is already booked. If you wish to remove your children from the Airport Watchlist, and their names were placed on the list as a result of a court Order, you will generally require a further Order removing the children from the Airport Watchlist

Question: My former partner has taken our children overseas without my consent. What can I do?

In circumstances where the children have already been removed from the country without the other parent’s consent, urgent processes can be initiated for their return. This can include an urgent application under the Hague Convention when children have been taken to a country that is a signatory to the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction. The Hague Convention is an international treaty that provides a pathway to recover children who have been abducted so that they can be returned to Australia, or their home country. Not all countries are signatories to the Hague Convention. If your child has been taken overseas without your consent, you should seek urgent expert legal advice. Any delay may impact on your chances of success.

It is important that you understand your rights and obligations if you are planning on travelling with your children. Make an appointment with Shannon Daykin, an Accredited Family Law Specialist, to discuss your circumstances and needs.

There are several reasons why you may be thinking about relocating, temporarily or permanently. You may wish to move to another town, move interstate or travel to another country. There is a common law presumption unless a Court makes another order that both parents of a child who is not 18 have parental responsibility for their child, and therefore there are legal implications that must be considered when relocating with a child, whether you are separated or divorced.

Today’s blog talks through some of the common questions asked when considering relocating with a child within Australia. The list is not exhaustive by any means, so we encourage you to speak to us to discuss the matter in detail and find out what’s right for your individual circumstances.

What is child relocation?

Child relocation can be described as the changing of a child’s living arrangements to another town, city, state or country. If parents have an order for equal shared parental responsibility, and a change to the child’s living arrangements makes it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with a parent, then the non-relocating parent’s consent to the relocation or court order permitting the move is needed.

The relevant legislation is s65DAA of the Family Law Act, which explains in detail the process that the court must follow when considering if a child should be spending equal or substantial time with each parent.

How do I get permission to move?

If there is a need to relocate, first and foremost it is encouraged that you talk to the other parent and try to come to an amicable agreement. You may be able to compromise on the other parent spending longer periods of time during school holidays or longer visits through the year, or your former partner may agree to move to where you are hoping to relocate to.

Attending dispute resolution can often help in reaching an agreement about the relocation. If you are able to resolve the issue, it is often best to enter into a written parenting plan or apply to the Family Court for a consent order to formalise the agreement.

How do I make plans for contact between my child and the other parent?

It is important to set out the parameters of contact or “time and communications” with the other parent on the type of contact (for example video calls, telephone calls and physical contact), how frequent communications or visits/time will be, how costs of travel will be split, if and how the child can travel, accompanied or otherwise. Once you have agreed on the frequency and type of communications, this can be recorded in writing, preferably in the form of a parenting consent order.

What if I can’t reach an agreement with the other parent?

If you have tried and failed to reach an agreement, you must demonstrate that you have attempted family dispute resolution (with the exception of family violence and other limited exceptions) before you can apply to the Federal Circuit Court for an order that permits relocation.

Obtaining a relocation order can be difficult, expensive and three may be delays. The court will always consider the best interests of the child before any other factors, as this is the paramount consideration for the court.

How do I apply to the court for a relocation order?

If you are applying for relocation, you will need to include in your application a demonstration of an attempt at Family Dispute Resolution, as well as detailed information of your plans for relocation. For example, you may need to include information on;

where you are going
your reasons for the relocation
the housing situation
plans for school and before/after school care
the support system in the new location
history of your relationship with your former partner
the relationship between the child and each parent
your proposals for the child’s time and communication with each parent after any relocation

What if the child is relocated without a court order?

If a parent moves without consent of the other parent or a court order, the other parent may be able to apply to the court for an order that the child or children be returned until an outcome has been determined by the court in certain circumstances. If a court order is already in place, the other parent may be able to file a contravention application to seek that a party who breaches a court order be punished.

If the other parent takes your child without discussing it with you, you can apply for a Recovery Order with the court, which enable police officers to take action to find, recover and return a child to you, as well as prohibiting that person from removing or taking possession of the child.

Final Thoughts...

As with any major decision to be made as separated parents, consideration should always be given to where family dispute resolution is appropriate. This is a means to try and resolve parenting issues without litigation if possible, with the help of a trained and independent professional.

Daykin Family Law have extensive experience in mediating outcomes for clients which can avoid the court process and provide you with certainty. Talk to us today about how we can assist you.

Shannon Daykin is an Accredited Family Law Specialist with extensive experience in helping with family law matters and dispute resolution. If you are struggling to agree on a relocation arrangement, contact Daykin Family Law today to let us devise a clear plan for you.

We give you expert legal advice on the most appropriate and cost-effective course of action for you and your family. Contact us on (07) 3852 5490 to make an appointment for a fixed fee initial consultation today.

The blog published by Daykin Family Law is intended as general information only and is not legal advice on any subject matter. By viewing the blog posts, the reader understands there is no solicitor-client relationship between the reader and the blog publisher. The blog should not be used as a substitute for legal advice from a legal practitioner, and readers are urged to consult Daykin Family Law on any legal queries concerning a specific situation.

Navigating government restrictions, school shutdowns, and illness during the coronavirus pandemic

Amidst the many drastic changes COVID-19 is forcing upon our everyday lives, the Family Law Courts have recognised the difficulties some families now face in adhering to their existing parenting arrangements or Orders. This has left many parents unsure of their rights and obligations throughout this pandemic.

As always, the primary concern of parents should be that of a child’s health and wellbeing. We’ve outlined the recommendations made by the Family Court’s Chief Justice and summarised our own guidance in navigating changing family circumstances.

Where restrictions contradict specifications in your parenting arrangement

In some instances, an established agreement or Order of the Court may include obligations on a parent which directly contradict the COVID-19 restrictions set out by the state and federal governments.

An example could include an arrangement in which the drop off/pick up location is specified as the child’s school, many of which are currently closed across the country.

The closure of schools and parents working from home

With many schools and after-hours care centres closed, families are experiencing a drastic change in routine and family dynamic. If one or both parents are able/forced to work from home, we suggest sitting down with both your former partner and your child/ren (separately if needed) in order to create a new family routine which allows for the continuance of both work commitments and schooling commitments, as well as valuable downtime between parent and child/ren.

If one or both parents have been deemed ‘essential workers’ and are required to leave the home for work, alternative arrangements may need to be made, perhaps with the assistance of friends and family. This is to ensure both you and your former partner are able to fulfil work obligations whilst children are unable to physically attend school.

Independent legal advice should be sought about the best way to record and document any agreement reached to deal with the changes arising from the pandemic relevant to your parenting arrangements.

When a parent falls ill

At some point, members of either household may find themselves having contracted the virus, or fearful of having contracted the virus due to close proximity with someone who has tested positive or recently been overseas. This will present challenges when children are moving between homes.

Furthermore, a parent may be concerned about their child/ren living within a household in which social distancing and biosafety recommendations are not being adhered to.

If you are concerned about your child’s health or safety, you should consider first raising any concerns you have with the other parent and seek to agree on a resolution that meets the child/ren’s needs and best promotes their wellbeing. If this is not practical or agreement cannot be reached between the parents, you should consider seeking independent legal advice regarding your specific situation as there are a range of options to assist in resolves issues like this.

Potential solutions

We have some guidance from the Courts, with the Statement from the Honourable Will Alstergren regarding Parenting Orders and COVID-19 released recently. This provides useful information for families during this difficult period.

If the arrangements you have in place with the other parent are simply unworkable in light of the pandemic then, as a first step, consider reaching an agreement with the other parent to modify any arrangements where necessary. In doing so, it’s important to remember that whilst the specifics of existing arrangements and Orders may not be logistically possible, the purpose and spirit of the order should remain unchanged and the primary priority should always be the health and safety of the child/ren involved.

If you are able to come to a mutually agreed solution, be sure to make the agreement in writing, whether over a formal letter, email or text. With the assistance of a Family Law specialist, any variations to parenting arrangements can be recorded in a way that will least likely cause issues later. If seeking to vary any orders of the Court, we recommend that you obtain advice about your specific situation.

If you are unable to come to a mutually agreeable solution, or contact with your former partner is not possible, you should consider seeking the assistance of a Family Law specialist or Family Mediation specialist.

Finding a new norm

Amidst the broader changes caused by the pandemic, it can be difficult for many families to maintain routine and normalcy. This can be particularly difficult for children of separated parents to keep to the routine they had in place with a parent previously when the restrictions make it impossible for them to continue.

The use of video calling and social media, facilitated by a parent as appropriate, are excellent tools for allowing a child to keep in contact with a parent whom they can no longer spend time with in person. Such activities can be built into a larger daily routine or schedule which gives back some of the structure lost without the routine of school and other activities (such as after-school sport).

By using these other methods of communication more frequently, this may assist in ensuring the bond and connection between a child and parent continues during any period where face-to-face contact cannot occur.

Reach out

If you are still unsure about your parental rights and responsibilities, or the effect that COVID-19 may have on your existing parenting arrangement or orders, contact us to discuss your situation and how best to promote your child’s best interests whilst ensuring that you continue to meet your obligations.

Shannon Daykin is an Accredited Family Law Specialist and Director of Daykin Family Law, offering telephone and video conferencing consultations throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, and in-person appointments where necessary.

We give you expert legal advice on the most appropriate and cost-effective course of action for you and your family. Contact us on (07) 3338 5645 to make an appointment for a fixed fee initial consultation today.

When parents separate, it can be one of the hardest times in their lives and the lives of their children. What comes next can lead to uncertainty and stress for everyone involved. Moving from managing one household that once had two parents, to two households with one parent in each can be a logistical nightmare. This is even without the emotional overlay of a relationship breakdown.

What you strive for

In an ideal world, an agreement would be reached by parents as to when the children spend time with each of them and how parenting will be managed across the two household until the children are 18. Apart from some teething issues, the parents will grow their co-parenting relationship with positivity and sensitivity and get it right between them. This is often not the case though.

For some separated parents, the balance is not right and too many roadblocks impact on the flow of life in both households for them and their children. It can feel like hitting up against a brick wall with no end in sight.

What if I don't live in an ideal world?

There are options however to move beyond any impasse and towards a better future for your children. The first step we would suggest for all parents, where appropriate, is to attempt direct negotiations with the other parent.

Direct negotiations do not necessarily need to be face-to-face. Sometimes a planned phone call, an email or even a simple text to explain what is happening and what you would like to change can be helpful. If you have a parenting order in place already, legal advice should be sought as a parenting plan entered into after a parenting order can effectively vary the operation of the order in some circumstances.

Sitting together face-to-face can be ideal, talking over issues in real time and cutting down on the ability for miscommunication over multiple emails and text messages. Often there are logical and reasonable explanations as to why a parenting arrangement is not working and solutions can be found. If parents are able to discuss these issues freely and constructively, then unnecessary conflict can be avoided in this scenario.

If differences can be resolved between parents, this can be a great foundation for a positive co-parenting relationship in the future and reinforces that parents are the best people to make decisions about their children. It can also be the most cost effective way to resolve issues.

Mediation

Sometimes direct negotiations are not helpful, or are not appropriate because of family violence issues for example. In this case, parents can utilise mediation services to discuss the issues with an independent third party. This may be needed if one parent wants to significantly change the current arrangement, or there are more complex issues to be resolved, as some examples.

There are a number of options for mediation. The most cost effective being the use of the Family Relationship Centres, Family Relationships Australia or other public and community-based services. These services are able to assist parents to discuss the issues and potentially write up a new parenting plan.

Private mediation services also exist, usually at a higher cost. However, most will allow you to bring your solicitor along. This can be helpful to receive advice on the spot regarding the law relating to your particular matter, your rights and the impact of any proposals. A solicitor can then draft the agreement terms on the day if it is appropriate, usually to be formalised soon after.

Counselling

Daykin Family Law works with a range of counsellors who know our industry and the specific struggles that separated families face.

Counselling can be a useful process for separated families, particularly if there has been a breakdown in one parent’s relationship with a child or a parent’s behaviour is causing issues. The counsellor can work individually with parents and children, or together, to identify what isn’t working and work on a plan to move forward.

If all else fails...

The last resort for all parenting disputes is an application to the court for parenting orders.

Depending on the circumstances, you may need to attempt family dispute resolution first. The court requires a Section 60I certificate to be obtained before an application is made to the court. This is a certificate to say you have been to mediation and made a genuine effort to negotiate, that you have invited the other person and they refused to attend or that your matter was not suitable to mediate. The court requires a valid certificate or an exception to apply before the application can be filed.

Litigation: been there, done that

In circumstances where there are already parenting orders in place, the court needs to be satisfied there has been a significant change in circumstances to warrant a change if there is no agreement.

We recommend that you seek independent legal advice if the current Orders you have in place for your children are no longer appropriate or are not working. There can be a range of reasons that a court might allow a parenting order to be varied.

The overarching consideration for the courts when making such decisions are the best interests of the child.

What if I end up in Court?

If you apply to the court, a Family Report may be needed to provide expert evidence to the court about your family and what is recommended to occur.

Independent representation of the children might be necessary by an Independent Children’s Lawyer to ascertain relevant information and assist the court in deciding what is in the best interests of the child.

If the last resort of court is necessary, then Daykin Family Law can guide you through the process. We focus on identifying issues at each step and advising you on your options, so that you can make informed decisions.

By taking a proactive approach to litigation, we have assisted many clients leave the court system sooner and get back to the important task of raising their children and moving on with their lives. We pride ourselves on only a very small percentage of our matters making it to a final hearing in the court because the advice we give is pragmatic and we explore all opportunities available to settle your matter without the high cost associated with litigation to the end.

Court Issued Parenting Orders

When making a parenting order, the Court applies a rebuttable presumption that it is in the best interests of the child for the child’s parents to have equal shared parental responsibility for the child. Parental responsibility refers to all duties, powers, responsibilities, and authority that parents have in relation to their children. These responsibilities and duties that parents have for their children include long-term decisions such as determining the children’s religion and making decisions about the child’s health and education.

This then means, unless the Court orders otherwise, it is presumed every parent has this parental responsibility and, as such, parents who have separated or divorced ought to share major decision-making regarding the children. It should be understood that although parental responsibility places an obligation of responsibility on the parent, it does not confer an automatic and absolute right of a parent towards the child. Under Australian legislation, the best interests of the child are paramount to the Court’s decision-making. It must be in the child’s best interests for an order to be made that both parents have equal shared parental responsibility. If such an order is made, the Court must then determine whether an order that the child spends equal time with both parents is in the child’s best interests and should be made. In a lot of cases, for a lot of reasons, this is not reasonably practicable, and other time arrangements must be considered.

Grandparents Rights

Orders for parental responsibility for a child are not just for parents. Such orders can be made in favour of a child’s grandparent(s) or any other person concerned with the child’s care, welfare, and development.

Connect with Daykin Family Law

If you have recently separated from your spouse or de facto partner, or have a child in your life whose long-term care you are concerned about, contact us today for a reduced fixed fee initial consultation to discuss your options. We have a great depth of experience in children’s matters, including acting for grandparents and non-parent applicants before the Court, and will provide you with no-nonsense, pragmatic advice.

First published 11 October 2016